well, last night my parents informed us that they are not going to colorado after all.    so essentially, i never had to make an actual decision.  it was very interesting because as the day went on (yesterday) i had an increasing sense of peace about not going.  i didn’t feel guilty about it and i didn’t feel that i was making that choice out of selfish motives.  and it was going to be okay.  God definitely helped me not grow anxious and worrisome over it.  i had pretty much made up my mind to stay home when my dad said that they weren’t going to go.  ::chuckle::  but i don’t think that all of the thought and time and prayer i put into the decision was for naught.  it was definitely a good experience for me to walk through, and there were good things for me to consider a mull over.  my parents did ask me what i had thought about/decided over the day.  so i shared it all with them.  so anyway, there’s an update about that.  thank you all for your prayers and encouragement.  God again revealed his faithfulness and his goodness.  soli deo gloria – to God alone be glory

although at one point in the conversation last night, i had the thought i wish i could just be perfect.  i really meant it, too.  sometimes i just get so tired of being sinful and flawed and struggling with all sorts of shortcomings and faults.  i want to be Godly and wise and discerning and loving and…perfect!  at least i know i’m on the right path, and every day God is perfecting me more and more and making me like Christ.  the journey is just painful and difficult.  sometimes i don’t want to make the journey.  i just want to be there.  but this is the great adventure, right?! 

holly called me last night!  it was so good to hear her voice!  we didn’t get to chat long, but it was still good.  and then i talked with luz for like, an hour and a half!  oh man, that was so wonderful.  i was so encouraged.  God definitely used our conversation to build my faith and renew my hope for change and growth.  it brings tears to my eyes to think about what amazing friends God has given me.  i could never make it in life without them.  i love you all! 

edit: and check out the picture chris found for me:  

  i’ve got it on my desktop.  except i did some lame-but-hey-it-works editing in microsoft paint so that it doesn’t have the movie info all over it…  


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